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February-05

Burma Shave

           Trains don't wander
           All over the map
           'Cause nobody sits
           In the engineer's lap
           Burma Shave

           She kissed the hairbrush
           By mistake
           She thought it was
           Her husband Jake
           Use Burma Shave

       Remember these? For those who never saw the Burma Shave signs, here is   a quick lesson in our history of the 1930's and '40's.

       Before theInterstates,when everyone drove the old 2 lane roads, Burma Shave signs would be   posted all over the countryside in farmers' fields.

       They were small red signs   with white letters. Five signs, about 100 feet apart,  each containing 1 line  of a! 4 line couplet...... and the obligatory 5th sign advertising Burma Shave, a popular shaving cream.

 Here are more of the actual signs:

           DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
           TO GAIN A MINUTE
           YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
           YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT
           Burma Shave

           DROVE TOO LONG
           DRIVER SNOOZING
           WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
           IS NOT AMUSING
           Burma Shave

           BROTHER SPEEDER
           LET'S REHEARSE
           ALL TOGETHER
           GOOD MORNING NURSE
           Burma Shave

           CAUTIOUS RIDER
           TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
           LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
           AND MORE STEER
           Burma Shave

           SPEED WAS HIGH
           WEATHER WAS NOT
           TIRES WERE THIN
           X MARKS THE SPOT
           Burma Shave

           THE MIDNIGHT RIDE
           OF PAUL FOR BEER
           LED TO A WARMER
           HEMISPHERE
           Burma Shave

           AROUND THE CURVE
           LICKETY-SPLIT
           ITS A BEAUTIFUL CAR
           WASN'T IT?
           Burma Shave

           NO MATTER THE PRICE
           NO MATTER HOW NEW
           THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
           IN THE CAR IS YOU
           Burma Shave

           A GUY WHO DRIVES
           A CAR WIDE OPEN
           IS NOT THINKIN'
           HE'S JUST HOPIN'
           Burma Shave

           AT INTERSECTIONS
           LOOK EACH WAY
           A HARP SOUNDS NICE
           BUT ITS HARD TO PLAY
           Burma Shave

           BOTH HANDS ON THE WHEEL
           EYES ON THE ROAD
           THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
           DRIVER'S CODE
           Burma Shave

           THE ONE WHO DRIVES
           WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKING
           DEPENDS ON YOU
           TO DO HIS THINKING
           Burma Shave

           CAR IN DITCH
           DRIVER IN TREE
           THE MOON WAS FULL
           AND SO WAS HE.
           Burma Shave

           And my all time favorite:

           PASSING SCHOOL ZONE
           TAKE IT SLOW
           LET OUR LITTLE
           SHAVERS GROW
           Burma Shave